Pepto-Bismol "fortunes"

 

1. Use the pharmacy next door.
2. The chef sends his apologies.
3. We followed the ten second rule.
4. You won’t be smiling long.
5. We did more than spit in your food.
6. Enjoy your stomach now.
7. You don’t look so good.
8. You’ll regret this.
9. See you in the bathroom.
10. This won’t taste as good coming up.
11. Two entrées was a bad idea.
12. Starving orphans don’t eat that fast.
13. My dog wouldn’t eat that.
14. Pay before the nausea kicks in.
15. Your meal’s on its way up.
16. Blame Pedro.
17. Brace your body for the fetal position.
18. This date’s gonna end with your head over a toilet.
19. We predict vomit.
20. Bathroom patrons are gonna think you’re giving birth. 

Pepto-Bismol.  We'll take care of it.